Support starts with understanding why
Going to school regularly helps children learn, spend time with friends and be part of their school community. That is why children should be in school every day they can.
When a child is struggling to come in, the starting point – for both you as a parent and the school – should be understanding why.
Your child’s school should listen, understand and work with you to overcome challenges.
What does a support-first approach mean?
Schools should take a supportive approach to helping your child to regularly attend school. A support-first approach means understanding why a child might be finding it difficult to go to school and working together with the family to address those barriers.
Schools should listen to the child and their parents, agree practical support, and review whether it is helping.
What support can families expect from their school?
Support should reflect your child’s age, needs and circumstances. Schools should:
Listen to you and your child
Explore what is making coming to school difficult, including worries at school or pressures at home.
Agree practical steps together
For a primary-aged child, this might involve support with morning routines, separation or transitions. For a secondary-aged child, it might focus on friendships, particular lessons, exams or travel.
Make support personal
Children with physical or mental health conditions or special educational needs and disabilities may need additional support or reasonable adjustments. Plans should be agreed with the family and reviewed.
Bring in other help where needed
Schools may work with the local authority, health, mental health, SEND, early help or other local services if needed such as a local family hub.
Start the conversation early
Problems can become harder to address once patterns are established.
What can parents do?
As a parent or carer, you have an important role in supporting your child go to school everyday.
Talk to your child and their school if you spot any changes in behaviour, difficulties in the morning or circumstances at home that may be affecting them.
You do not need to know the solution before asking for help. School will work together with you to agree manageable steps, then review what is and is not working.
A useful approach for one child may not suit another, and support may need to change as children grow or their circumstances change.
You can also make sure you are familiar with the NHS ‘is my child to ill for school’ advice and where possible book medical appointments outside of school time. If that's not possible, send them in before and after the appointment so they don’t miss a full day.
It’s also important to recognise that children with long-term medical conditions, serious mental health challenges, or special educational needs and disabilities (SEND) may encounter additional obstacles. For those experiencing complex barriers to attendance, schools should engage in compassionate discussions with both children and their families, collaborating to provide tailored support that meets their specific needs.